sunnuntai 22. heinäkuuta 2012

A cowards monologue.

We are all weak.

It doesn`t necessarily make us worse. Weakness, being weak, has two sides. Like everything.

Those who support fascist leaders are weak. They don`t want their families, friends or themselves to suffer or get murdered.

Those who really believe in these leaders are weak, because they have gotten bored with this world order. They get worse one in its place. They don`t change their mind, because the don`t want to admit that they were wrong, because they believe all the shit about those who their leaders tell them to hate, and because they fear that when that goverment falls, all goes to hell. They`re usually right about this.

Those who oppose them are weak. Their actions don`t help their society immediately, and they fight against misery with misery, because they don`t have anything else to fight with. Afterwards they die (or live, rest of their lives, traumatized (maybe I`m wrong)). Uncertain. Did they really matter, they ask themselves, in one way or another. Some of them pretend that they`re sure that they mattered. But they wonder if they did, like the rest of them.

The bullies of society enjoy the power that they get, or "get", by creating fear, hate and bitterness. Because the are weak, they use the satisfaction that they get out of it, to repair their self-esteem. Some of them realize that it didn`t help a fucks worth. And by that time the damage has been done. And some of them feel guilty because of it.

Weak are those who feel guilty. They can`t stop themselves from feeling guilty, and sometimes they can`t stop feeling guilty. But, it`s better than not feeling guilt. remorse. Because if you don`t feel guilty, it may mean that you should.

Those who judge others are weak. Even if they would be correct about those judgements, it doesn`t make them better, because they forget to judge themselves, too. Or they don`t want to. And even if they would judge themselves, they still wont change.

Weak are those who don`t change. They say they want to, but they really don`t. "I will help those who deserve help. I swear." They don`t do so. "I will spend more time with you. I promise." They brake those promises. They don`t change because they are too lazy and weak to so. Instead, they hope that the problems will fix themselves. They wish for world peace, and say that they will at least try to do something to create it. But they don`t even do that.

Weak are those who don`t even pretend that they will try to change. They only care about themselves, or if they have at least a bit decency, about the ten beings closest to them. Not those who haven`t eaten in days. Not those who live under a filthy bridge. Not those who seriously think about killing themselves, or who drown themselves in alcohol because they feel that they have to. FUCK THEM. They deserve it anyway.

Weak are those who suffer of all things evil, or some of them. Weak are the bullied and the oppressed. They swallow it all, no matter how depressing or sharp or repulsive. They have no other choice. When you`re weak, you have no other choice. Some of them plan to humiliate the bastards who did this to them. But they never do. Some are too tired to think those kind of thoughts.

Those who are depressed are weak. They don`t see no point in living. They hope that they can get away from it all. Many of them try to. They kill themselves. But they don`t solve their problems that way. They only cause more grief, or even worse, sadistic joy (and in some cultures, joy because the one who killed one self has moved to another plain of existence). But they didn`t see no other choice. they were too weak to see any.

Those who live in lies are weak. Too weak to admit that living in truth isn`t just harmony, joy and/or parties. And you almost can`t blame them for living in the lie. But you should. You should get mad at them if they don`t even care about their childs or friends life. Don`t care how their closest beings feel about life itself. Because they don`t want World to be a cruel place. Bu it is as much of it as it a happy place.

Those who fight against the cruelness of the world, the universe, THE OMNIVERSE, are weak. They fight against the evil that menaces their fellow streetwalkers, but in the end, just protect a world where every model of society of is wrong.

Do you see yourself in any of them? You should (not necessarily in the first two, though). Because you`re all of them. I`m all of them. Your friends, parents enemies and god and /or gods (expect if you`re an atheist) are  all of them. Because of this, you get my sympathy. And possibly my hate too. But that ones simply a "maybe".

We are all weak, and we are all cowards.

We suffer of cowardice. We are sick.

Sick people shouldn`t be hated for their sickness.

And yet, they are hated precisely because of it.  

I`m getting tired of it.

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